I have heard it said for years that the situations in life that we go through will either make us bitter or better. I have always believed that to be true. I have seen many folks go through trying times in their lives and come out on the other side stronger and more determined. And I have also seen some folks go through trying times and come out very bitter and just give up. The sad thing is we are all capable of having either of these reactions to a situation that we go through in life. We make the chose, it is totally up to us as an individual as to how we will react. A few days ago I visited a couple of folks that were in the same situation, facing the same thing. But what was totally mind blowing was that they chose two very different ways of reacting to and handling the situation. They were the ultimate illustration of how a situation can make you bitter or better.
Both of the folks I visited was in nursing homes, they have reached a place in their lives where they can no longer live and care for themselves. Age has taken its tole on their health and thier minds. A choice had to be made for their continued care and it involved a complete change for them. A change in where they lived and a change in thier dailey routine and maybe most important to them thier freedom to come and go as they please. They both have lived a good full life, with many family and friends to share it with and now they find themselves in a totally diffrent situation, its as if they are starting all over again in a place that is uncomfortable and lonely for them. Probably thier worst enemy is thier memories of how it use to be making it very difficult to become content in where they are now. Like we tend to do they focuse on the past and what life was instead of living in the here and now and making the best of what the present day brings.
My first visit was to a wonderful lady that I have known for the past few years, she has the sweetest spirit about her. Her spirit was the first thing I noticed when we met. She has a beautiful smile and such a godly way about her, you always leave her presents feeling up lifted and glad you had the time with her. A few months ago after several illnesses and aging to 91 years young she had come to the place where it wasn't good for her to be alone. She needed to be in a place where folks could help her with everyday tasks and making sure she had proper meals and health care. So as her children told her of thier concerns and safty isssues they had with her living alone she decide it was time to give up her home and move to an nursing facillity. Now as I visit her there I am amazed at the way she is handling this great change in her life. She still has her beautiful smile and her sweet spirit. She still talks of her home and how life use to be but she does it with a positive attitude. She has choosen to be positive and to be content in the situation that she is in. If she had her druthers she would be back home living on her own, but she relizes that it isn't possible and accepts her new life and what it has to offer. I still leave her presence feeling uplifted and glad that I had some time to spend with her. Her situation has only made her better and for that I am gratful for it has been and inspiration and blessing to me.
My secound visit was with a man that has served the Lord for years and given so much of his time to others. I have known him for years and have enjoyed many visits him and loved to hear him talk of the Lord and how serving him was the most important thing. He has been a great influance in my christian life. But he like my other friend has been plagued with that thing we call old age, and the health problems that come along with it. So the choice also had to be made for him to go to a nursing facility. But as I visit him I see before me someone who I don't really know anymore. His joy is gone and his spirit seems to be dried up and crumbling away. He speaks of all his has lost and wonders where the Lord is. He feels as if he is in a prison paying for something he did wrong. He sees nothing beyond the pain and lonelyness he feels, and nothing I can say can ease his pain and bitterness. He feels abandond by everyone, even the Lord. He doesn't see anything positive in his life. He feels everything he has done in the past has been useless and without meaning. He know longer wants to be a postivite influance and doesn't seem to be able to show love and compassion like he once did. I left my visit with him feeling physically sick and shaken by what I had experianced with him. How has this happened to such a man of God, such a loving and giving man? Would it not have been a better choice for him to be more like the lady I first visited, he would be happier and would have a better influance on folks around him. It all boiles down to the choice, to be bitter or better.
I haven't gotten over my visits and the two folks that I shared time with. I have relized that we all have the choice of being bitter or better everyday in every situation. We will be committed to our choice like these two folks are, so we need to be sure we make the right choice every time in every situation. Because I have learned from these to people that your choice doesn't only effect you it effects everyone around you. How do I want to be remembered? As a person that no matter what I went through I keep a sweet spiirit about me, or as a person that has become bitter and spews it out on all around me. God help me to be more aware of my choice in handling situations and people. Help my automatic response to be with a sweet spirit to be content in what ever situation I may be in.
Lord, help me to be better not bitter.
